All We Soldiers

Today is February 2, 2011, Groundhog's Day. And the 22nd anniversary of my dad's death. His name was John Dillard "J.D." King III.

I'm certainly sad about this, but the sadness is more of what I would call an 'old sadness,' not one that truly affects me day-to-day. At least not consciously. In fact, most of my memories from childhood are very sunny and warm, like an old photograph. Still, there's a nostalgic sense of sorrow mixed with sweetness whenever I reflect on these periods. So in that way, I am definitely a sentimental person, but quite optimistic, interestingly. 'Old sadness' is kind of a theme of a song I just wrote and recorded as part of a week-long songwriting/recording challenge called Record Time VI (check out the blog here).

While the song isn't specifically about my dad, I incorporated many of the ideas I mentioned above in both the song and the artwork (which is of me and my brother as kids, taken by my father) without really meaning to. It's appropriate that it worked out to be done on Feb 2. Could it be... SATAN?! (A little Church Lady reference for you old SNL fans.) Ha! Actually, quite the contrary: I think God has beautiful and unexpected ways of reminding me He loves me.

Anyway, here's the song. Enjoy!

And here's the lyrics.

CAMERON KING

"ALL WE SOLDIERS"

© 2011

I wonder how far I’ll get walking backwards
I wonder if I care if I’m getting anywhere
Looking back there, everything’s yellow
And looking ahead, it seems the color’s left the air

Walking time in a straight line, so
Part of me is still behind me

Memories and dreams hang around like phantoms
A flash of your eyes, and in the night I hear you call
A moment we shared and you have both gone
So can I be sure that it ever happened at all?

Who I am and who I was, see
One of us is surely dying

Earth is spinning, stars are singing
We’re all waiting while we’re fading
These old days, they’re growing hazy
We’re still fighting, hoping brightly

All we soldiers
Marching onward
Towing all our dreams behind us
They define us
As they blind us

All we soldiers
Marching onward
Holding tightly to what’s rightly ours
Towing all our dreams behind us
They define us
As they blind us
Can’t rewind us

Groundhog Day

Groundhog Day (which is one my favorite comedies - I'll blog more one day on the type of comedies that always catch my fancy) and its namesake (February 2nd) will always hold some bittersweetness for me. Groundhog Day 1989 is the day my dad (John Dillard King III) died of cancer (I was 7), and in some ways my siblings and my mom are forced to relive that day each year not unlike Bill Murray's character was forced to relive his own Groundhog Day over and over in the movie. I know that Christopher, my older brother, in particular feels the effect of the day strongly. It reminds me of Frodo in the Lord of the Rings, because there was a long period of his life after his adventures where he would become sick on the anniversary of being stabbed by the ring-wraith on Weathertop, and also on the anniversary of being stung by the huge spider in Mordor.

20 years' distance does help a bit, to be sure. It doesn't feel anything now like it did in the days and months after it happened. But 20 years! Wow. Very hard to believe that nearly 3 times as many years have passed as how many I'd lived around my dad. People often wonder if I can remember him very well, but I always explain that in my child's mind at age 7, a world with Dad was the only one I'd ever known, so all I have to do is remember what it was like to be a kid, and with all those memories come a lot filled with him. Sometimes the things I remember remind me of myself now that I'm an adult (of course he was a much older adult than I am - he was 53 when I was born!), particularly in areas of humor. He was good at waiting for the joke, just like me. Good comedy takes a lot of patience (reference Andy Kaufman for an example of what I mean), especially when you're using the contrast of inaction and action (like the basic fun thing to do with kids of acting like you don't know they are there, like you're reading or something, knowing the kid is locked on you with a huge smile, and then when they get close, making a loud noise and quickly reaching out to grab them). And then occasionally I'll catch a memory of my dad calling for me to come to dinner or something (I was always slow - still quite am) because all of a sudden I'll hear his voice in mine when I'm saying something to Sarah across the house.

I have to admit though that all my personal knowledge of Dad is from a child's perspective, and though I've heard a lot about the adult side of his life, it's different from actually knowing him as an adult myself. I sure would like to have a conversation with him now, just to see how our personalities would get along. I'm sure he was even more interesting and quirky than I realize (as all people are once you get to know them), and I would have loved to see our relationship play out as I got older.

I'm glad to know above all that he trusted Christ. And I trust God through all the circumstances of my life, even my dad's death. When he died, I was, as a 7-year-old, confronted with the idea of 'eternity' and I began my own journey of trusting Christ. If He could keep my dad safe in Heaven, He could do the same for me. The words of Ecclesiastes 3:10-11 have become particularly poignant since that time.

elkins, part 2

I've been meaning to keep posting about all my ventures to Elkins in October, but heck, what can I say? So hard to keep this thing current...

ANYWHO, I got to go down to my hometown a second time the weekend of October 5th for the beloved fall event I always try to plan ahead to attend: Forest Festival! It was awesome; everybody in my family but Colleen [sad face] got to be there, including Christopher and Alice. Everyone not from Elkins always asks me what the Forest Festival is like, and it's hard to describe. Obviously it's celebrating the forest; there's a maid who becomes a queen (Sylvia) and she has a coronation on Friday of the festival in which there are many ladies of her court whose dresses are the colors of the forest and nature. And of course it has all sorts of arts and crafts associated with such West Virginian culture. And music is heard all throughout, from folk to bluegrass to country and everything in between. There is also a 'primitive encampment' set up where people live in authetic frontiersmen-like tents with real cookfires and wool blankets and everything! This was a huge hit when we were boys.

But my favorite events of the festival happen on Saturday morning and are centered around lumberjacking. Unfortunately I didn't get any pictures of it this year, but there are several competitions in a field at the bottom of Davis & Elkins College surrounding some set up logs that are basically trees with their branches cut off. Lumberjacks have to try and saw them down fast and accurately (they're trying to make them hit a peg when they fall). They also do this awesome competition with shorter logs where they chop into them at a height, stick a plank in the side, hop on the plank and start chopping higher and repeat the process till they're at the top, and then they chop the top part of the log off. So cool.

This year I also got to visit my dad's grave (he died of cancer in 1989), which I did get some good pictures of. He's got the only rounded top gravestone in the entire new section of the cemetary! I actually used to draw it some when I was little. Beside Dad (J.D. King III) lies his good friend Jim Woodrum, who also has a unique grave marker: a bench. His wife, Bonnie, who's a good friend of my mom (Annette), also obtained permission to plant a tree by his grave.



On Saturday of the festival, we all went up to Bear Haven by Spruce Knob, one of our favorite places to be. It has a bunch of great rocks to climb around on and some amazing mountain views, and it was an absoultely perfect day. I'll let the pictures speak their own words...





It was a great overall visit to Elkins. The only group shot I have of some of the siblings/spouses is here on the corner of 3rd and Davis, and Alice is only half in it and Christopher isn't at all. Oh well. I guess I like scenery more than people. ...just kidding.